Writing Portfolio


My writing is pup-approved.

The New Yorker
If Corporations, Rather Than the Corporatized U.S. Health-Care System, Handled Childbirth

McSweeney’s Internet Tendency
Dorothy Peter Parker

An Open Invitation to Touch My Pregnant Belly

You Have Been Damned to Attend Cindy’s Virtual Nail Polish Party for All of Eternity

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Scary Mommy
Does Bluey Have Eldest Daughter Syndrome?

25 Baby Names Inspired By Drag Artists From RuPaul’s Drag Race

10 Creative Ways To Use Target’s Classic $10 Kiddie Pool That Don’t Involve Water

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Points in Case
I’ve Written the Best, or Quite Possibly the Worst, Novel Ever

My Child Is Perfect, Even Though He’s a Venomous Gila Monster

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Introvert, Dear
10 Things Introverts Wish Were Real in Order to Escape Social Situations

The Belladonna Comedy
Taming The Wild Copier In The Teachers’ Lounge

An Apology from the Owner of “Dining in the Abyss”: the Sensory Deprivation Restaurant

The Broadway Beat
“When Are We Getting a PHANTOM OF THE OPERA Revival?” asks Mysterious,
Cloaked, Andrew-Lloyd-Webber-Shaped Figure


Fantine Actress Claims Costume’s Barbecue Sauce Stain is Character Choice

Slackjaw
Contrived Metaphors From My Novel About Seasonal Depression

7 Rejected Hallmark Rom-Coms for Easter

Jane Austen’s Wastebasket

Mantras for First-Year Teachers, Explained by a Guy Who is Trying Not to Drown

Yoga for Non-Confrontational People Who Need to Set Boundaries

Weekly Humorist
Your Luggage Is Not Lost; It’s On a Journey of Its Own Choosing

How Romeo and Juliet Would Have Ended if Written By Children’s Authors